​Last night my friend called me 

And before I could have said hello

I heard her sniffing,

Like a rain pouring against

The glass pane.

Hey sarah! Are you okay?

I sounded calm like a sea,

Since this wasn’t the first time.

She cried.

Last week it was for a cat she found

Dead by the roadside

And week before that

It was the death of her favorite


From a series.

What is it, hun?

I asked while pouring the milk

And balancing the phone between

My ear and shoulder.

I am in chaos

In utter chaos.

So this time she couldn’t find the reason to cry

I thought to myself.

I cleared my throat and began

Why don’t you have some sleep.

I can’t!

She cut in before I could have showered some wise words.

I feel!

I feel nothing!

I feel unwanted!

I feel unloved!

I feel broken!

I feel like I exist but I do not!

I breathe but I suffocate!

I- I –

This time I cut in-

Hey! We all love you!

It’s just the product of your mind!

It’s 12 am

And you have a long day ahead!

Pray to-

Pray to??

She lost the temper

And threw words out

As after this eruption

Volcano will be dead!

I called Raj, he says

Pray to Krishna!

I talked to Jane

She says, pray to jesus!

I texted Hassan and

He answered

Pray to Allah.

Tena said I should

Believe in science

And let a psychiatrist do the work.

But who knows what I need??

Alright! I sighed!

Well sleep now and we will figure this out


she put the phone down

Promising that she would go to bed

And leave the mess out of her head.

Proud of myself

I decided to eat a cookie

And while munching it I

Smiled- what a great Friend I am!

New morning

New sunrise

I head to work

With mind so light!

I let my fingers

Dance on keyboard

Until I checked my phone

In afternoon,

“Hey you got the news?

Sarah is found dead

In her room!

I logged on my facebook

And wall filled with her photos

Posted by mutual friends

Who she hardly ever talked to.

With the caption RIP

And I felt my blood gushing through my ears and

Bursting my heart

I wanted to scream

You say


But what difference does it make now?

We all need some attention

And on virtual world

The death news of neighbor’s dog

Can get you more likes than you get on

A photo you click with your boyfriend

Or the chocolate cake you had

Last Sunday.

While they get hearts

And thumbs

And sorrowful smilies.

I sit back quietly


I somewhere know,

I ripped her!

But I ask myself

What Sarah actually needed

that religion and science

Couldn’t give?


One thought on “Chaos! 

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